Back Alley Brawl, 4/2/2017
This week's Back Alley Brawl went right to the wrestling, with no backstage preamble except a recap of the #1 contender's Triple Threat plans at DESTRUCTIVE IMPULSES.
Madam Destrova vs. "Cowboy" Whiskey Wisconsin: Whiskey at least makes it all the way to the ring under his own power this week, and even cuts a brief line dance and tosses a few AAW towels to the crowd. Then Madame Destrova stalks to the ring, and Whiskey retreats to his corner and trembles while she enters. They start with a collar-and-elbow tie-up and it's off to the races. Whiskey gets the early offense, but Destrova is barely phased and clearly gets the better of their exchanges. A missile dropkick attempt is reversed into an Alabama Slam and a Mind Probe that Destrova breaks on purpose; Whiskey tries to stagger to his corner to recover and is met with a spinning heel kick and the Killer Gaze of the Basilisk, sending him sinking to the mat where he doesn't even resist the pinfall.
After the match, Destrova is interviewed by Tom Spiracy. Destrova stares at him until he stops asking questions, then announces that she is clearly the most deserving contender to Marcus Smart's AAW World Championship, before marching away down the hall.
Tag team match, Section 14 (Iggy Noble & "Anarchy" Andrew Fawkes) vs. Amie Rose and Marty. The match begins with Section 14 absolutely dominating Marty, with both Fawkes and Noble garnering two-counts. Marty is finally able to break free of a Black Ice setup by Noble and get the hot tag to Amie, who can't quite keep pace with Iggy but is able to nail him with a desperation facebuster that gets him to tag in Fawkes while he recovers. Amie endures Fawkes' onslaught, reverses a Flag Smasher attempt into a headscissors takedown, and hits the Meteora for a decisive two-count that is broken up by a diving Iggy. She tries to rally again, but Iggy exposes a turnbuckle, allowing Fawkes to nail a modified Buckle Bomb that leaves Rose dead on her feet. She escapes by the skin of her teeth and tags in Marty, but this time the Flag Smasher connects, and a snickering Fawkes tags in Iggy, who locks on the Firewall, putting further stress on Marty's abdomen and forcing a tapout.
After the match, Section 14 celebrates and mocks the faces, only to be attacked from behind by a chair-swinging Nero Santana! Nero assaults everyone, first driving Marty out of the ring and then concentrating on Iggy until he bails, then coming after Fawkes, whom he leaves unconscious in the middle of the ring. Only after Santana has stormed out (down the aisle of Section 14 where Marcus usually enters) does Iggy come back in and rescue the ravaged Fawkes.
The show then cuts to a teaser for a new wrestler, showing off a woman doing various high-flying moves and hard-hitting kicks in the Ace Alley training facility we saw during Fatal Attraction while a hard-driving, flamenco-tinged electronica song plays in the background. A woman's voice does the voiceover, talking about training in the streets with the best breakdancers, in Mexico at the finest lucha libre schools, and in the back alleys with the best brawlers America's underbelly can offer. The video shows her devastating several Ace Alley trainers, then cuts to a shot of the woman's back, showing off long, purple-streaked hair and skin-tight black clothing, as the voiceover tells AAW to get ready for "Belladonna Blitz."
MAIN EVENT: The Cleric of the Grey Lady vs. Joe Crank. The wrestler once called Father McDonnell enters, to the bizarre, Ring video-esque entrance package of the Knights of the Grey Lady, and strips off his metalhead/cultist entrance gear to reveal a dark, stripped-down new ring gear. Joe Crank looks intimidated, but still lands the first blow, raining blows down on the Cleric to almost no effect, only for the Cleric to retaliate with a discus lariat that turns Joe inside out and then beckon for more. The taunting continues, with Crank hurling everything he can think of at the Cleric but never getting more than a two-count; the Cleric uses a similarly brutal, largely punch-based offense that dazes Crank but never quite puts him down. Joe Crank hits Bazooka Joe, a Michinoku Driver, and a tilt-a-whirl DDT; the Cleric uses a double-knee facebreaker, a flying forearm smash, and a springboard Superman punch. The brutal exchange ends when Joe tries to set up for the Crankcase and catches a Codebreaker for his trouble, then gets stungunned against the top rope and locked in the Lay On Hands, where he passes out and the match ends by knockout. After Tom announces his win, the Cleric takes the microphone, and tells the AAW audience that next week, the Knight of the Grey Lady will reveal their plans.
That's all for this week! DESTRUCTIVE IMPULSES is coming to you on Sunday, April 23rd, with a #1 contender's Triple Threat: Nero Santana vs. Iggy Noble vs. Ron "The Real Deal" Steele!
